Pandemic Spring 2020 and My Higher Power

April 2020

So, this was pretty cool...

I started my day reading about the runner's wave - just a little hand signal shared as two runners - strangers - pass each other, acknowledging each other, offering support, a little nudge to keep going.

For the most part, this pandemic thing hadn't really gotten to me. Work was affected, but I still had a job. The kids had been laid off and not in school, but they were trying to stay busy and were getting their unemployment checks. Everyone was more or less healthy by now (it was a tough winter for Joli and my parents). But every now and then, I'd click one too many news stories, or Doomscroll the wrong article or overhear someone who just didn't get it. And I'd get pulled down. My mood would sour and I'd be irritable and discontented.

That afternoon, after I finished whatever it was that I was doing to procrastinate and in such a state, I went over to Breakheart for a walk around the lower lake to try to get my head back in the game. I had my iPod going, good tunes. Nora En Pure, I think (because Nora En Pure).

About five minutes in I heard/felt a runner coming up the hill from behind. As he passed me on the left, we looked at each other and gave each other the runner's wave.

Then we looked again and realized we recognized each other. And we both stopped.

It was Ted - the first guy I met at my very first meeting. We chatted for a few minutes. He asked how my meetings were going. I told him they were going really well, adjusting to the new world, and trying on-line meetings. He was too. I told him I was coming up on four years. He said I looked great, better than I did back then, and to keep it up. We wished each other well. He went back to running.

I had to stop and reflect on what had just happened - God gives you what you need right when you need it. I finished my hike with a spring in my step.
 

The 2017 Oscars

In keeping with my annual tradition, I didn't actually see any of the movies nominated for Best Picture this year. But I might have seen these alternate films:

“Hell or High Water” A charmingly quirky story of a divorced father in West Texas desperately trying to explain to his ex-con older brother how reverse mortgages actually work, while scheming to stay one step ahead of the sheriff, who could just as easily have been played by Tommy Lee Jones.

“Hacksaw Ridge” A charmingly quirky story of a decorated WWII American Army Medic who, after being honorably discharged, takes a job at Home Depot in the store's eponymous tool area. He becomes the first man explain the differences between a hacksaw, a back saw, a coping saw, and a PVC saw without asking the guy in the other aisle.

“Fences” A charmingly quirky story of a working-class African-American father raising his family in the 1950s, while coming to terms with his past and that Gray Grantham continues to be one of the lamest names ever for a movie's main character.

“Arrival” A charmingly quirky story of an elite team of expert linguists brought together to decipher the garbled messages from a mysterious airport PA announcer that is quite possibly threatening global and intergalactic harmony by reassigning the gates and baggage carousels for inbound spacecraft.

"Lion" A charmingly quirky story, loosely based on true events, of a five-year-old Indian boy who gets lost, thousands of kilometers from home. He survives many challenges on the streets of Calcutta before being adopted by a couple in Australia; 25 years later, racked with guilt, he sets out to find his lost family and is mauled by a lion.

“Manchester by the Sea” A charmingly quirky story of an uncle living in Quincy who is asked to return home the North Shore to babysit his nephew. Not knowing the delays to come, he struggles with his decision to take the Southeast Expressway during rush hour. Seeing the Dorchester Gas Tank, he recounts past past traffic nightmares and the automotive congestion that caused him to leave Manchester and stick to the South Shore. Look for the upcoming sequel – Salem by the Power Plant.

“Hidden Figures” A charmingly quirky story of a trailblazing team of clothing designers and seamstresses who created the over-sized sweatshirts and baggy sweatpants that serve a vital role on campuses everywhere during the early hours of Finals Week.

“Moonlight” A charmingly quirky story of discovery and investigation, this film chronicles the lives of Maddie and David as they struggle with top-billing, clever writing, and the right weeknight time slot while facing the rough and tumble world of supermarket tabloid covers and industry rumors.

“La La (I'm Not Listening) Land” A charmingly quirky love story between Sebastian, a jazz musician on the rise, and Mia, an aspiring waitress, who is just so goddamned tired of Sebastian's constant yammering and insistence that he has found the way for Hollywood to make a good musical again.

A Rainy Day (a work in progress)

A Rainy Day

A late summer day. Near the end of the season. We came to a convenient stopping point. I was reading on the porch and finished my chapter. You were sketching over on the corner. The tide was going out; the sea gulls were coming in. "Wanna take a walk?" "Sure."

Walking up the driveway towards the street. It's a beautiful view of the river from here.

My aunt drove up and stopped on her way out. "Get back to the house soon. I have a fire in the fireplace." "OK, we'll be quick. Just going to go the mail." The mail box was about a quarter of a mile away.

We walked by the garage. And winked at each other.

It's a beautiful walk to the street. Marshes. Vernal ponds. Wildlife habitats. No mail.

The weather changed on the way back.

Started raining. Not a drenching rain, but it was raining.

Your white tee-shirt, well... It's a beautiful bra. And I think you were colder than you expected.

We walked briskly back to the house through the rain. Your warmness and wetness inspiring.

My aunt was right. When we got back to the house there was a fire in the fireplace. A roaring fire in the living room.

Shivering, we snuggled in front of the fireplace to warm up. Closer. Closer. You are very soft and warm.

I lift your t-shirt off. Yum. I can tell you are still a little chilly. You take my t-shirt off. We are warm together. Holding each other. Kissing. Holding. Caressing. Mmmm...

Ideas for a trivia contest

Ideas for a trivia contest

Round 1
IRIS
IMUS
IBIS - this bird...
IBM - the motto or slogan of this company is THINK
I Shot The Sheriff

Round 2
Slider - small hamburgers
Goose - duck, duck
Charlie - Brown (or chocolate factory)
Iceman - the dude in Italian Alps
Maverick - Mel Gibson or James Garner

Round 3
Apple -
Pear - Pair, pare
Banana - fake government
Orange - no rhymes
Tomato - not a vegetable
Lettuce - vegetable almost never served warm

Round 4
Denver
Hale
Schaefer
Wells
Louise

Round 5
Marley
Barley
Farley
Narly - surfing
Harley - motorcycle

When I have the guts to share...

Hi.

I'm Rick. And I'm an alcoholic. I hope you don't mind if I read...

I've been coming to meetings here, and in a couple of other places, on and off for a little over a year and a half.

They say you never forget your first time. So here I am sharing for the first time.

Like the typical first time, I'm going to fumble for around a bit. But it will be awkwardly quick and maybe satisfying. For me, at least.

So here I am sharing ...

I really started drinking in high school when a friend of mine and I found an unattended case of Molson at a beach party. My mother later told me that she knew I had over-served myself when I drank a half-gallon of orange juice the next morning. Well, it was actually early afternoon.

And away I went... Just booze. I tried pot and coke for a little while and that didn't work. I stuck to just booze. Mostly beer and shots. Since then I think I have probably gone almost every day for 35 years without not drinking. Funnels, kegs, pitchers, fake IDs, blackouts, vomiting. All the good stuff. I've been pulled over by the police a few times - I am very good at my backward alphabet, I know how to walk a straight line, where my nose is, where my car is, and where my pants are. I have been very lucky.

There were drinks with the guys after work. Drinks with the girls after work. A little something before dinner. A little something after dinner. A little something to get the day started. A Bloody Mary or two before the Thanksgiving feast. And then after. And at Easter. And Patriot's Day. And then Arbor Day... And... And then drinks with the guys before golf. And, of course, drinks with the guys after golf. And drinks just because...

And then...

And then my ex-wife began to go upstairs when I came home from work because she heard the ice go into my glass of vodka. Before I got angry. I didn't know why. Now I do.

And then my old son almost punched me in the face because - I didn't know why. Now I do.

And then my daughter walked home from my apartment in the middle of the night because - I didn't know why. Now I do.

And then a friend had to drive me around the parking lot to find my car because I forgot where I parked - I didn't know why. Now I do.

And then my girlfriend slept in the other room, or made me sleep in the other room because - I didn't know why. Now I do.

And then there were lots of drinks just because - I didn't know why. Now I do.

I'm not sober yet. But I'm getting closer. These meetings are important to me. This is a tough road.

If you looked closely at the back of my shirt a year ago you would see footprints from my ex-wife, my two kids, my parents, and my girlfriend kicking me here. I'm hoping that if you look closely now, you'll also see my own small footprints.

Thanks for listening. My name is Rick. And I'm an alcoholic.

The 2016 Oscars

It's that Time of Year...

As is always the case, I didn't see any of the movies nominated for Best Picture this year. Here are some movies I might have seen instead:

The Small Tall (The Big Short) -- Several Wall Street insiders concoct a way to profit from the upscale coffee market without going all Venti.

Bridge of Spies Like Us (Bridge of Spies) -- In this wacky comedy, three dolts are given a special assignment after they are caught cheating on their LSATs. Believing they are being rewarded, they are sent to the Middle East on a top-secret assignment to rescue a pilot shot down in Russia and returned years ago. Hilarity ensues.

Newark (Brooklyn) -- Lured by the promise of America, a young Irish immigrant departs Ireland and the comfort of her mother's home for the shores of northern New Jersey. The initial shackles of homesickness quickly diminish as she realizes it's pretty expensive here and she needs to make money. Badda Bing!

Irritated Max: Whatever Street (Mad Max: Fury Road) -- A post-apocalyptic action thriller featuring a frazzled commuter and the guy in front of him who just won't take the right turn, dammit!

The Martian (The Martian) -- A Ka-Boom. There was supposed to be an Earth-shattering Ka-Boom! But there wasn't.

The What Now? (The Revenant) -- No idea what a Revenant is. Leonardo is raped by a bear. (Drops mike - leaves stage.)

Get a Room (Room) -- After Jack and his Ma escape from the enclosed surroundings, the boy makes a thrilling discovery: he's five, for Crissake. He'll get over it. As he experiences all the joy, excitement, and fear that this new adventure brings, he holds tight to the one thing that matters most of all - his iPhone.

Nightlight (Spotlight) -- A team of investigative reporters uncovers the hidden truth behind the glow under the bedside table, and why no one wants to talk about it.

Forbidden Basement

(Forbidden Basement – You are renting a room in someone’s house as you transition to living in a new city. The owner tells you that basement is absolutely, 100% off limits. You don’t bat an eye at this request, until you start hearing noises from the basement at night. After several weeks of this, you sneak downstairs to see what’s going on. Finish the scene.)

My boss had asked my if I was interested in taking a temporary assignment out of town to bring some new staff up to speed. It would be in Richmond, Virginia, probably lasting six months or so. With the project's per diem and having nothing better to do, I said OK. My girlfriend hooked me up with AirBnB and she found me an attractive house in Richmond, not too far away from the university and the job site.

I flew down to Richmond and Uber-ed my way to the house. I met up with Edgar, apparently the owner, and we went over the ground rules. He had to be away for a while but I would have the run of the house, except for the basement. Given the cost of the place and my per diem, I said that would be fine. I might even make some money.

The work was pretty straight-forward. The company had done pretty well recently and hired a bunch of new staff in the shipping group. I was training them. I've done it tons of times, but it takes a while. After a few months or so, however, I realized that my classes weren't running as smoothly as they had. I was distracted; I was tired. I was sleeping poorly. I was waking up in the middle of the night to some sort of weird rhythm. Everyone was learning what they needed, but as the training progressed, I didn't have that pep to present the way I used to have.

One night, right before a double espresso and right after bedtime, I was wide awake. I heard a sound. And it clicked. The sound didn't “click” but it made sense now. When I was trying to go to sleep each night, there was this Thub! Thub!! Thub!!! distracting me, coming from the basement. That was messing up my sleep.

Ping! Now that I knew, I had to explore. Edgar was an excellent host, but still I needed to get into the basement... I heard the sound again.

It was coming from in the basement. This Thub! Thub!! Thub!!! was coming from behind the basement door. And now it was getting Louder! Louder! Louder! I knew this was the distraction. I knew I had to find the source of the thub. I knew, also, I wasn't allowed down in the basement. I knew also, also, that Edgar wasn't home. I turned the knob.

I got to the bottom of the stairs. Now, the noise was deafening. It seemed like it knew I was looking.

Thub! Thub!! Thub!!! It was coming from the main part of the cellar - not in the corner workshop or over by the coal bin. But it was loud. I couldn't quite place it.

Thub! Thub!! Thub!!! I looked around. Under the snow tires. Behind the beer fridge. Near the washer and drier. Nothing. As I looked around, I saw a spot on the ceiling where the sound seemed to be coming from.

Curious, I found a chair in the corner of the basement and dragged in under the thumping under the ceiling. It was getting louder. I got off the chair and went back to the shop area and found a screwdriver.

Louder! Louder! Louder! I went back to the chair and climbed on.

Louder! Louder! Louder! Locating the source of the deafening sound, I pried the ceiling planks down. Years of dust coated my face.

And plop into my hands. There, there, still beating, was the hideous heart.